Finding My New Purpose At 60.

As we Baby Boomers age, do you think we become more interested in in making whatever life we have left in the tank more meaningful?

As our family grows, including our newest addition Benny, (the doggie), our minimal time together has become more valuable to me.

I just turned sixty. It came and went without fanfare. I tried to convince myself that it was “no big deal,” but ……… 60 is kinda a big dill. 🙂

I know so many people who blow off their own birthday by saying, “It’s just another day.” To me, it’s not just another day, it’s another day to celebrate life, celebrate another year of being alive, and turning 60 is a celebration!

I remember when I was a young adult, I always thought it was a bit morbid that my parents would always check the obituaries. My Dad would say that he was just checking to make sure he wasn’t in there. This, of course, was back when most every household had a local paper delivered to their home.

I don’t quite recall when I started checking the obituaries but, I can tell you that I’ve been doing it for several decades. And, if I’m being honest, I find it distressing that there are many who don’t make it to that 60 year mark. So, if you weren’t with me before on the “celebration” thing then read the obituaries! It will make you want to observe and honor that day the next time it comes around.

CELEBRATE!

When I was 20, I thought, I have my whole life, (whatever that means), ahead of me. I was going to make a difference in this world, although, I don’t think I knew how I was going to make a difference.

At 40, my thoughts were more along the lines of just keeping my business running, getting kids to and from their activities, making sure their homework was done and making sure there was food on the table. At 40, I was totally engrossed in survival mode. I remember so , so, so many times thinking, I‘ll have time for _____, (insert whatever it was), when the kids are out of the house. Or, I’ll have time for that when I retire.

The perfect 60th birthday present from Poo. Little charms representing the
first initials of my 2 grandsons. (>

And now ……… at 60, what am I thinking?

Leading up to this big birthday, I experienced a bit of angst.

I found myself reflecting on my life, LIKE ….. A LOT. Past, present and future.

Is this normal?

I felt as if I couldn’t stop thinking about the past, not just the missteps but also the wins.

Regardless of any prior lapse in judgements and basic life miscalculations, or accomplishments, I have few regrets. I, like most humans, have made my fair share of blunders, big and small but, in general, I’m good with God regarding my choices.

I raised two daughters who are intelligent, capable, and self reliant, as well as excelling at Motherhood. (They are wonderful Mothers). I volunteered my time to worthy causes whenever I could. I can also say without a doubt, that I chose the right profession and have nurtured a business for over 35 years. And even though I’ve made some pretty big mistakes up to this point, my regrets are minimal.

But, what’s next?

1 1/2 lbs. of Dungenous Crab for my 60th birthday. YUMMMM!

So ………. recently, I’ve spent a momentous amount of time trying to figure out what direction I want the last part of my life to go and …………

I can successfully report that I don’t know. 🙂

I’m not sure what “direction” even means for me, but there are a few things I do know:

  1. I want to continue to exercise.
    • I have to be able to chase after or keep up with my grandchildren. And, when they get to certain age, probably somewhere around 10 or 12, they’re not going to want to hang out with Kiki. (Well, I hope they still do!)
  2. I want to choose what I eat more wisely.
    • I’m pretty good with this but after the debacle with the construction at our house last year, I fell off the band wagon and I’m still trying to reverse some bad habits I adopted during that stressful time.
  3. I want to nurture my desire to become more self-aware.
    • Undoubtedly, I have things I need to work on. It’s important that I learn to show up for myself. If I can’t do that, then I can’t show up for anyone else in a meaningful way. Which leads into the next one ……..
  4. I want to normalize self care.
    • I have always put my family first, always at the expense of my own needs. I have never fully realized how damaging this has been until recently. I have always thought it was an admiral quality to sacrifice, ______, (insert whatever it is), to be there for others and I am only now understanding how counterproductive this behavior is for all involved. I didn’t set a good example for my daughters by doing this. I have to learn how to take care of myself and, not just by eating right and exercising. I’m a work in progress.
  5. I want to travel more.
    • For many of us, this wasn’t a possibility when we were younger. Much of your income goes to raising children. Traveling with kids usually means working around their school & activity schedules. At this stage in life, I’m not retired yet but presumably, we can take off any time during the year and possibly more time than when we were raising children.
  6. I need to find my “New Purpose.”
    • I think many of us get stuck “defining ourselves” a certain way and I have found it a struggle to think of myself in other ways. A very large chunk of my life has been dedicated to motherhood, family and entrepreneurship. These labels don’t necessarily define me anymore.

These are a few of the things I want moving forward. God willing, I would like a few more decades for more life adventures and exploration.

I am still working but after closing in on 40 years in a fast-paced and grueling profession, I recently started taking Fridays off. Having a 3-day weekend threw me for a loop at first. I was waking up on Friday morning wandering around the house trying to figure out what I wanted to do for the day.

At that point I realized I owed Poo a bit of grace when he retired and was having a difficult time finding his footing. And here I am feeling discombobulated with just 1 extra free day. Who knew?

In my last post, "Do You Let Life Define You?" I discuss living your life as you want later in life.
I definitely want to spend as much time as I can with these Tiny Boogers 🙂

I’m sure I’ll figure it out, I mean, I don’t really have a choice so ……………. Here we go!

“By the time you’re 80 years old you’ve learned everything. You just need to remember it.” – George Burns

xoxo, Katy

%d bloggers like this: