February Challenge – Can You Listen Without Interrupting?

Sometimes, I just can’t stop myself.

Me, with my 7 siblings last September. The last sibling picture we have of all of us together was taken in 2008.

Yes, I’m one of those. I don’t intentionally want to interrupt my friends, my family, my children, or my spouse.

I’m impatient at times and, as much as I hate the association it has with rudeness, I will interject my thoughts into another’s commentary.

I am the youngest of eight and, my Baby Boomer siblings might say while growing up I was spoiled, possibly a contributing factor to this act of self- centeredness. But, in my mind, I’m just jockeying for a position. A chance to speak. 🙂

Seriously, being the youngest of eight, I never got a word in edgewise.

The truth is …….. I need to be more aware.

So, here it is …….. my Micro-Resolution for the month of February.

Listen More, Talk Less.

I’m not sure when this terribly insensitive habit started, as I was always the quiet kid growing up, but most likely it was during the first few years of college, when I started to emerge from my quiet self. It was during my first semester at IU, that I write about in a post titled “MOM, WHY DIDN’T YOU BECOME A WRITER?,” when I realized I would not survive in such a large campus learning environment if I didn’t allow my true spunkiness to emerge from my tiny 5’2″ frame.

However, if I want to break this pattern of behavior, I must first figure out why I feel compelled to do it, right?

So, why do I interrupt others?

According to leading experts in the field, there can be multiple reasons or motivations behind my actions, which may include:

  • Feeling the need to belong.
  • Attempting to relate to others.
  • Wanting to gain the audience’s attention.
  • Fear of forgetting what I want to say.
  • My own lack of self awareness.
  • A desire to prove expertise on the topic being discussed.
  • Everyone else is interrupting and I want in on the action too.
  • Or, I might be passionate about the topic.

If I’m being brutally honest, I suppose all of these reasons could apply to any of my particular circumstances.

  1. Of course I want to belong!
  2. Do I feel the need to be relatable? Yes.
  3. Do I want to be the center of attention? Mostly no, but sometimes.
  4. And, yes, I loose my train of thought sometimes and can forget what I want to add to the conversation.
  5. Lack of self awareness? I suppose so.
  6. Although I don’t consider myself an expert in ANYTHING, who wouldn’t want to be on something? I probably pretend to know more about weightlifting than I actually do.
  7. And, because I am so passionate about lifting, I might try to act like I know it all, but don’t fall for my BS! 🙂
I have been lifting for 5 years now but, last year I began adding supersets, compound sets & drop sets to my routine and it has helped my muscle definition. You can read about how, and why, I started weightlifting in my post, “GETTING FIT AFTER 50.”

But, I shall fret no longer ……. I found some tips from the experts on how to change that awful, impatient, and rude perception I am projecting:

  • Put a finger over your lips as a reminder.
  • Ask a friend to tip you off if you do interrupt.
  • Challenge yourself to stay quiet.
  • Don’t assume a pause is the end of the discussion.
  • Wait 10 seconds before responding.
  • Try to repeat back what the person said.
  • Don’t be thinking of a solution for the problem.

My February resolution is off to a good start. I have already stopped myself, a few times, trying to rush in and interject my thoughts. Cudo’s to me!

Can I keep it going?

It’s still early ………

“Listening is an attitude of the heart, a genuine desire to be with another.” – L. J. Isham

xoxo, Katy

Author: Katy

I am a business owner, a mom of two grown daughters, a wife, and lover of life! I am an active 50+ -er with many new developing interests. Physical activity has always played a role in my life. Sometimes, more ........and sometimes, less. As a "Baby Boomer," it has become increasingly important for me to navigate the aging process with grace and agility. Part of the healthy living equation is, of course, the nutritional aspect as well. This blog, first and foremost, is devoted to women over the age of 50 looking to improve the quality of their life by exercising and consuming a healthy diet. Cheers to a life well lived! *You can read more about me by visiting my Home Page.